Shinji Ikari (碇 シンジ) (
hedgehogsdilemma) wrote in
hugtopia_logs2019-09-29 11:34 pm
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Entry tags:
[Closed] Let me tell you something
♥ Who: Shinji and Kaito
♥ Where: Kai's house
♥ When: End of Ohnir
♥ What: Getting some quality zzz's
♥ Rating: PGish? for now, will update accordingly if things change.
About halfway through the month, Kaito had caught Shinji in a pretty poor state sleep-wise, and after strong-arming him into a nap, insisted that he should let Kai know if things got bad again. It's a very nice idea, in theory, though Shinji's not the type to go out of his way to seek help. How much use would he realistically get out of the offer? Well...
For the most part, he can deal with nights of little sleep, just as long as he can get some meaningful rest most nights. However once he found himself on his own once more, that unexplained, unexpected figure started creeping back into his typical dreams and nightmares. As it shows up more and more, Shinji finds himself once again getting less and less substantial sleep, simply becoming a just little too anxious about it. If his inability to calm his nerves enough to relax his exhausted body are any indication, tonight seems like it will be another difficult night. Before it gets to be too late, Shinji, mercifully, makes himself confront this inevitability sleepless night, and what he should be doing about it.
He doesn't want to bother Kai, even if the other assured him that coming over for some rest wouldn't be a hassle. But, if he runs into him again looking as worn down as he feels, he's sure there's no way it wouldn't be cause another fuss. If he at least sends Kai a message, then that pretty much obligates him to show up, no matter how much he might be wavering now. Do that much, and he has no reason to back out. So, that's how, as nighttime overtakes Havenwell, Shinji's otherwise empty and quiet house finds itself a little busier as the boy paces about, staring down his communicator and slowly gathering up the resolve to send out a simple message.
'Are you busy right now?'
And, before he can second-guess himself yet again, he sends it off.
♥ Where: Kai's house
♥ When: End of Ohnir
♥ What: Getting some quality zzz's
♥ Rating: PGish? for now, will update accordingly if things change.
About halfway through the month, Kaito had caught Shinji in a pretty poor state sleep-wise, and after strong-arming him into a nap, insisted that he should let Kai know if things got bad again. It's a very nice idea, in theory, though Shinji's not the type to go out of his way to seek help. How much use would he realistically get out of the offer? Well...
For the most part, he can deal with nights of little sleep, just as long as he can get some meaningful rest most nights. However once he found himself on his own once more, that unexplained, unexpected figure started creeping back into his typical dreams and nightmares. As it shows up more and more, Shinji finds himself once again getting less and less substantial sleep, simply becoming a just little too anxious about it. If his inability to calm his nerves enough to relax his exhausted body are any indication, tonight seems like it will be another difficult night. Before it gets to be too late, Shinji, mercifully, makes himself confront this inevitability sleepless night, and what he should be doing about it.
He doesn't want to bother Kai, even if the other assured him that coming over for some rest wouldn't be a hassle. But, if he runs into him again looking as worn down as he feels, he's sure there's no way it wouldn't be cause another fuss. If he at least sends Kai a message, then that pretty much obligates him to show up, no matter how much he might be wavering now. Do that much, and he has no reason to back out. So, that's how, as nighttime overtakes Havenwell, Shinji's otherwise empty and quiet house finds itself a little busier as the boy paces about, staring down his communicator and slowly gathering up the resolve to send out a simple message.
'Are you busy right now?'
And, before he can second-guess himself yet again, he sends it off.
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Also, he was just kind of tired. Ainea's priests had finally shooed him out, insisting he get sleep in his own bed. Ib would be just fine for one night. Fine, fine, sure, he was going.
Check out the sweet timing on this message then. Kai sat up in bed, firing off a quick message back. If Shinji was sending him a message, Kai already had a good idea of what it was about. Good boy, Shinji.
'Nope. Door's unlocked.'
(If these things had emojis on them, it was signed with an orange.)
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But, Kai sure did catch on quickly, didn't he? Shinji stares at the return message for a moment, feeling a bit embarrassed that his intentions were so transparent, and perhaps a little so for the simple fact that he's planning on running to someone for enough comfort to catch some sleep. It just strikes him as... childish.
He's put himself in a situation where he wouldn't be able to easily back out now, though! He doesn't will himself to leave immediately, but after a minute or so, he replies back, 'Okay', and with that... he doesn't necessarily need to brink anything extra for this, does he? Off he goes, then...!
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Kai had gotten himself out of bed though. There was the distinct impression that Shinji would be a little too polite to just wander Kai's house to find him if he did manage to let himself in. To make this process easier, Kai went ahead and propped the front door open before he wandered off into the kitchen to grab a glass of water.
Did he bother putting a shirt back on for any of this? No, why would he. This was sleeptime attire.
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Keeping the door open was a smart move on Kai's part. Not only is it going to give Shinji an incentive to let himself in, but it also keeps him from loitering outside, wondering if it would be better to just call off this whole plan. Doing that in front of an invitingly opened door? That would just be ridiculous.
The trip from house to house is a short enough one that Shinji arrives fairly quickly. Having somehow come to the conclusion that Kai's cryptic 'mostly' regarding his 'alone' living situation may have meant something like him having a pet, the open door is a bit of an alarming sight. So! Inside! He goes! If only for the benefit of being able to carefully close the door behind him.
"Excuse me," spoken softly as he enters, slipping his shoes off.
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Kai came shuffling out of the kitchen to lean into the entranceway. "Hey," he greeted a touch sleepily. Briefly taking a moment to take in the state of Shinji's everything, Kai nodded to himself. The boy looked a bit rough around the edges, but it wasn't as terrible as it could be. It was heartening that this was happening before it hit that point!
"Come on in, you want some water or anything?"
Moving through the house would show Shinji that it was a very sparse home. Beyond some misplaced blankets in the living room, the place looks largely untouched. The kitchen-- which Kai was ducking back in to with a beckoning gesture-- was a little bit more lived in with the signs of dishes, but not by much.
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To be fair to Kai, there probably aren't many houses around that are particularly lived in just yet. A few months isn't much time to get a lot of replacement belongings when everyone's starting from scratch, and Shinji knows that his place doesn't look much different at this point, right down to the kitchen showing more signs of use than anything else. This, more or less, doesn't feel too strange.
He does take note of Kai's sleepy sounding tone, which does hit him with a slight pang of guilt. Had he woken Kai up...? He frowns a little at the thought.
"I'm okay. Thank you, though."
No reason to keep him up longer, if that is the case.
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"Sure."
Let him just fill this other glass up then. Even with going through that motion, Kai left it right there on the kitchen table. The recipient wasn't going to back that night, but it'd become habit enough already. That odd task complete, Kai turned a small, unbothered grin towards Shinji.
"C'mon then. My room's this way." He hit the lights, leading Shinji through mystery house to get right to the Cozy Point.
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Shinji watches this little ritual unfold, a bit puzzled, but ultimately doesn't comment on it before Kai beckons him through once more. There's... there's probably a reason he did that, and maybe some day he'll learn. Not tonight, though, or at least not right now. There's sleep to be had.
There's still a feeling of weirdness that's downright impossible for him to shake about this. Taking a quick nap at the temple was kind of odd, sure, but it's a totally different beast when neither of them are completely familiar with the environment. Being in someone else's house for this, on the other hand, he can't help but feel like he's intruding.
Still! Follow he does! Straight to the Cozy Point!
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Kai led him through whatever layout these houses were in. Most of the rooms were shut, but there was one that was cracked open a bit and then the one with the door wide open, which Kai slipped his way in to. There was a mess of a blanket with a extra pillow thrown haphazardly on top of from when Kai had grabbed it earlier.
He grabbed it again now, moving it properly up to the head of the bed. It was the same as Shinji's-- really not that much bigger than that cot had been, but it was at least somewhat more comfortable. "Didn't ask last time, but is there a side you prefer?"
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He considers the question for a very brief moment before replying, "Not really." It's... kind of hard to think about a single-person bed really having a 'side', and outside of occasionally bringing out futons for easier room-sharing, their cot adventure from earlier in the month is the only real time he'd even have to consider something like that.
Even if he had an answer for this, he's not sure it's all that important in the long run. He feels as if he's already asking a lot just by being here, why complicate it further?
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That meant there was absolutely nothing to worry about. Nothing at all! Kai certainly thought this. There was just enough of something there though that made him give the other boy a considering look. It was an almost familiar sensation, though this kind of sleepover wasn't a dire situation. The core elements were the same though: a polite kid uncertain if asking for help was really, actually okay and not a bother. Luckily it wasn't like Shinji had any pent up childhood guilt towards him so this should be even easier to deal with!!
Kai unceremoniously plopped himself on the bed, waving his hand super casually over at him. Check out this Shinji-sized space left over!
"You're good, Shinji. C'mon."
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And, as luck would have it, he has just the thing to fill that Shinji-sized space on that bed (it's him!) so! On to the bed with he goes! It is time to lie down and reprise their trip to cozytown. Having done this once before makes it feel... marginally less awkward. Still not great, but that much easier.
"Can I ask you something...?"
A little light conversation before settling in will, possibly, mitigate some of that awkwardness.
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“Yeah. Go for it.”
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"You said before that you live alone 'mostly'," and, for the most part, Shinji hasn't been able to pick up on much that would suggest his hunch may be right. No clear or obvious signs of anyone or anything besides Kai being here, not even something like a secret second fridge to hide a more unusual animal. Very odd. "What did you mean by that?"
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"Oh," Kai said, almost surprised. There was an affirmative noise behind Shinji's shoulder, since a nod wasn't going to do much good here. "Yeah. A little girl comes to stay when she needs to. S'why I keep the door unlocked."
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But not occasional-roommates, and definitely not little girls just looking for somewhere to spend some time. That is one mystery solved, though!
"Really..." huh. It's not all too surprising, if Kai's extended the offer to Shinji, why wouldn't he extend it to others, as well? There do seem to be quite a few kids running around Havenwell, and while he vaguely recalls someone mentioning opening up their home to any of them that need the space, letting them have some kind of option to choose from is pretty kind. "That's really nice of you."
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"I guess," he murmured softly. It had just felt like the obvious thing to do. "Wanted to make sure she's got a place to go that's safe but not like... back her into a corner."
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It might be good for him to keep in mind that there's a chance Kai could have someone else hanging around sometimes, too.
"Hmm," he doesn't know who this girl is, but he quietly hopes Kai's offer has given her some extra peace of mind. "I was just curious."
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Answering them was one of the few things he could do, after all. Besides offering spare rooms and bedsides and hoping something worked.
After a moment he quietly added, "Don't want you to feel backed into anything either."
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He glances back over his shoulder very briefly in surprise, but of course it's not like Kai's going to know how little choice he'd actually had over his life in the months leading up to his arrival on Aellyn. Having the kind of absolute freedom that comes with sticking yourself in an empty house has been... a lot for him to get used to, but he's also very used to people older than him putting him in positions he has no real say in.
He probably could have gotten away with not coming over tonight, if he was feeling stubborn enough. Showing up really had been his choice, all Kai had done was extend the offer and kept his door open.
"Ah..." he settles back down, a little unsure of how to process this courtesy. "That... means a lot."
'Thank you'.
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So he wouldn't.
He'd just take this as it was. "Mmm," he offered, "just... let me know whenever, if you want me to back off." If or when it came to that.
He'd at least take it into consideration.
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That, too, is a nice sentiment. He really doesn't like the idea of having to resort to something like that, but should he find himself needing to put some distance between himself and Kai, at least that's an option. You know, for Kai's own good, probably.
"I'll... keep it in mind." Just in case. "Honestly, I haven't thought that I want you to back off, though."
Maybe that can provide Kai his own little peace of mind.
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It was still easy for the thought to float to the top of his mind. To sit there at the tip of his tongue and just wait for the inevitable. That's just how these things worked. There wasn't nearly enough contrary evidence to start changing his baseline just yet.
But he could keep the thought quiet and swallow it back down. Even if it would change later, Shinji's sentiment was just as nice in the moment.
"Ha, well, that's good to know. I'll try not to wear out my welcome. Was there anything else you wanted to ask while you've got the floor?"
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"Nothing I can think of." Nothing that might not come up later organically, or are so pressing he'd like an answer right away, anyway. Questions like why Kai seems to be going out of his way for him might be on his mind pretty frequently when they're hanging out, but if it's something that's going to be asked, he'll want to ask it in a situation where they should both be getting sleep instead.
For now, he's good.
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With no more immediate questions on the horizon, the full sleepy was in effect. He wasn't sure how much of this blanket being pulled over his thoughts was because he'd already been tired, or because of the new comfort that came with having someone curled up with him, but man it sure was there.
"Wake me if you need anythin'," he rumbled softly, letting his eyes sink closed.
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